Wow, where did that last month go, anyways? Sometimes I get to feeling flat--and I just don't want to go out much. Usually happens around the holiday season. I spent this past month removed from the public sphere...didn't even play anywhere except in the livingroom of my new apartment.

Instead, if you can believe this--I made Christmas baskets. You know, those gifts of chocolates and jams and hershey's kisses and jellybeans and homemade potato chips all nestled into excelsoir (fancy name for shredded wood). Wrapped up in crisp, clangy cellophane & curly ribbon on top.

THAT is how I spent the holiday season. Standing for eight hours a day stuffing goodies in a basket. Okay, I admit it. I did it for the money.

I have to say,though, I was digging doing it for awhile (stuffing baskets, making money). The experience was rather meditative. I spent the hours pondering the thought of people opening their gifts & finding all these little shiny treats meant just for them. And, each moment of wonder and discovery--a small coo of joy perhaps--as little bags of ju-jubes and chocolate chip cookies were plucked from their baskets, unwrapped...and consumed. The softness of the feeling...'oh. you did this for me?'

notebook entry #7--November 25th, 2002

Monday morning.
That's that really.

notebook entry #6--November 19th, 2002

Good day, then. Really beautiful outside here in toronto. Warmed up from that unexpected snowfall the other day. People said it would stick, but I knew it wouldn't.

I'm about to move into a window-less basement apartment. Suddenly, every moment that I am outside I am acutely aware of the light (not sun, but light...) on my skin. Converting body molecules into vitamin D. I have never appreciated so much the pureness of light. Oh man, that's sounding cheesy--but I can't really explain it. The sensation is not cheesy at all. It's like floating in particles. Those tiny glistening bits that swim about in the air.

I'm looking forward to the 'urban-ness' of the underground pad, the mood lighting and swank paint job that makes up for the complete absence of windows. But, oh the light...

I will go on more walks.

notebook entry #5--November 11th, 2002

I'd like to think that in the face of a faceless war machine that I'd have the courage to stand my ground. To speak up and fight for what is life-loving & good. To not cower in fear of being ostrasized, of dying, or of 'offending' those in power who intimidate & bully. Would I have had the guts to shove a tattered shirt into a tank gun pointed at me? I do not accept war.

notebook entry #4--November 4th, 2002

So. It's Sunday afternoon, kinda cold, kinda grey outside. And, I'm lazing about trying to do something with my day. This morning, with coffee, I popped in a new video School House Rocks. "Conjunction junction, what's your function?? Linking up nouns and phrases and clauses." YES! The old school house rocks short films I used to watch when I was a kid. Remember, they used to air them on television to educate us kids about numbers & grammar, etc using groovy cartoons & tunes. I forgot how rah-rah American Patriotic some of the history/'social studies' clips are...but I LOVE the grammar & counting ones. Fabulo-so. "Lolly, Lolly get your adverbs here!" Yeah, that's been my day so far. Those of you who came out to the Holy Joe's show &/or the Oasis got to experience first hand the rocker chick in me! I've just started experimenting with my electric guitar, and I LOVE my new distortion amp--there's something about strapping on the weight of an electric & giving one solid strum on the strings-- the ambient dirt. I like it, and I think I'll keep playing this new fangled "ecletric folk". hmm.

notebook entry #3--early October 2002

Wow, so...I just want to say that I am THRILLED with the help and support people are giving to help me get these shows going. Tania & I went for a lovely postering session last week in Kingston for the upcoming Scherzo show (thanks too diane & adam), and Lana thanks for doing the fax out. I'm pretty excited about the next couple of weeks...

notebook entry #2--Also September 2002

Okay that first thing I wrote ("entry #1") is a bit vague--I admit it...but with all the whirling and busy-ness going on with finishing up at school and getting this site to work...I haven't really even had a minute to think about how this connects to the MUSIC that I'm doing!!

So I have great imaginations for this web space ...music snippets and lyrics, perhaps I'll even post some of the photos I've been taking--the whole creative package...

Ever feel like you're a little engine warming up, chug-chugging into gear? Solar powered, of course.

notebook entry #1--September 2002

I'm happy, patting myself on the head for finally getting this site up and running...
And, I'm writing this little blurb, aware that someone in the ether world may actually read these words. The space between public & private is a glowing screen.

This is the start of something, but I don't even know what.
hello little cactus!